No idea how to say this. (and side account, friends know my main account), wtf to even post this. & # x200b; So when (37m) I have sex with a partner, I prefer not to ejaculate. I can, if I force it. But naturally I enter a state, I guess you would call it a meditative state. When my partner climaxes I get a huge endorphin/adrenaline high as if I’ve physically cummed. But I don’t go soft. I don’t get tired I just keep doing it until my partner climaxes when she fucks my “cum”… does anyone else do this? And if so is there a term for it? Yes I actually feel more satisfied after fucking physically not cumming, never experienced blue balls because of it. I know some girls like to ejaculate so I have to stop and really focus on physical cumming. Yes, I physically ejaculate when I masturbate, although not always. I have zero refractory period, I don’t go soft even if I ejaculate physically. After the session, it takes about 15 minutes for my penis to calm down and become soft. But I’m always ready for another round. partner part. I’ve always had f(s)wb going (stupid high sex drive) before my wife (41f) and it was never an issue, lots of praise. But this long-lasting relationship has also proved to have some complications. Now considered sick. I was young and dumb and certainly didn’t explain it well to the wife, or at least what she got from it that she couldn’t stand me. Which is not the case. Like I said, when she suffers, I suffer. There are some downsides, sessions can be long, I like foreplay so do it for a while (15-30 mins, we both like it) and the PIV part takes however long she wants to keep it but its average is about 15-45 minutes, for that she averages about 4-6 orgasms. So just having sex is at least an hour long affair, I never thought it was a bad thing, and I know there are other things you need to do in the day besides fuck, so I Really try not to hum his feet all day. Ha. She can be competitive, and I’m a person who likes to take care of my partner. While she racks her brains, she thinks I am not having fun, or enjoying myself. Despite clear signs that I’m too low on endorphins as a fucking moth my mind. and participating enthusiastically. She’s having a really hard time that I’m not physically coping, or if I do she thinks it’s forced on her. To the extent where she is shying away from sex and I as a person who enjoys sex multiple times a day if possible, and married her because she was with me for our entire dating period of 2 years Could have If I don’t think he did, I won’t marry him. I know how important sexual chemistry is to me, ever since I was little. Now sex sometimes slows down to a month between sessions, she says she feels so inadequate and doesn’t make sense because she can’t make me cum (again that’s not true, but trust me does not). I have told him that I will not be with someone who cannot tolerate me. But this has become a huge stress for him and I don’t know what to do. I still don’t get up (cum mentally) I just take it out for her, but she thinks I’m just holding back, and not enjoying it, which I definitely am physically I enjoy cumming, I’m sad when the Guy Cums session is over, even though I’m still hard and can continue. How to remove it? I just need to be intimate with him, I don’t care if I’m suffering mentally or physically, it’s been years or it’s stressful sex and it’s seriously hurting me, I worry K seizures and some severe depression are what I get to overcome. Sex is a huge part of my core, I’ve always prided myself on being an amazingly open minded partner, when she’s losing her mind so am I! It’s my duty to make sure my partner is being taken care of, and feels loved, and I love doing that. She cooled down only after about 2 years of marriage. It got into her mind that since she can’t stand me, she doesn’t want to fuck me. that came out of left field btw. Zero alert. It hurts, rejection hurts, it’s been years. I’ve been hard on myself for accepting that she can no longer have zero sexual appetite. And now I take care of myself because of the constant rejection and basically begging him to be intimate with me every 3-6 weeks when I reach breaking point. Side notes… she loves sex when we’re having sex, super wet, really into it. having a blast. The next day she’s totally flirtatious, she has the spark of sex, giving me pleasures and telling me how much she made love last night, and by the end of the day she has completely forgotten that she was actually I enjoy sex and have turned colder and colder back. I swear she needs sex more than me. We don’t drink much, more social drinks, but when we do the chill kicks in and she can’t keep her hands off me, literally grabs my hands and throws them over hers, me every time Tries to fuck, eyes are not on us. Then after company leaves she gets colder and colder again… what do I do? what can i do oh also she is very jealous any female friend or acquaintance who comes over she tells me if i fuck them she will never fuck me again… i should note… i never cheated , There is no desire to cheat. And I’m not possessive, if she finds a boy toy she wants to have fun with, I don’t care, she’s not owned. I would ask her to be open with me about it, to be an adult and to be safe, while I expect this same level of openness, I know she doesn’t roleplay it that way, so I’ve never talked to her about it. Haven’t done anything. This way. If you fuck them I won’t fuck you this threat is honestly pretty hilarious, you can’t threaten to stop sex if you’re not having sex. Breaks my mind…. So if you’re worried that I’m going to cheat on you because you’re not fucking me. Then why don’t you fuck me? As said earlier breaks my mind. & # x200b; Things to know because I know someone is going to say something. I take care of the kids, I’m a great cook, and I clean the house, so she can really come home and relax. She used to feel guilty for not doing anything a while ago and now tries to put our youngest child to sleep. But other than that I do everything around the house. And I wouldn’t care at all… if I was getting fucked. Plus, I know that most women’s desire isn’t always tied to being sensual and down dog. But so is the environment that fosters it. I am affectionate, take the initiative to do small things for him, day off. Tell her I love her and really try to show it in ways she can understand. I’m not just humping her leg at night demanding sex and be shocked and behold she’s not in the mood because I’ve taken her out of the day/week or ignored her. I’m really working on my emotional self and communication, as I know she can’t read my mind and I can’t read hers. I will explain that I need him, and how important it is to me. And she needs to realize that she can be more open to intimacy. She’ll try for about a week to go back to being colder and colder. The cycle repeats. Years have passed. I know I don’t know everything, I know I still need to learn a lot, and I’m always pushing myself to be a better partner. So I appreciate some different perspectives, opinions, thoughts, ideas. Also my own little goldfish brain. He has depression. Bi-polar runs in her family, but refuses to see a therapist, her family is very conservative, active, and has a mindset that quotes “Only crazy people go to therapists and I’m not crazy!” I on the other hand think that most people should go to a therapist simply to offer self reflection and growth. I have suggested marriage counseling, but she sees no point in it. (honestly I feel like everyone will blame her, and that’s why she is avoiding it. I just want her to get better so we can move on in our lives) Divorce is something I really want to avoid I’m trying to because it would create a huge problem that honestly I’m not ready to even approach, so while I know there’s probably a better partner out there for me. I’m trying to work with my wife and try to recreate what we had. & # x200b; I know the top part is a jumbled mess, but hopefully you guys can figure it out.
Wife’s libido is gone Mother, it is difficult to meet Waldo now.
2 months ago 1 Comment
Firstly, your post was WAYYY too long. You went on and on about the same things when this could’ve been a few paragraphs long.
Good point on the therapy stuff though, because I do think that that would be very good for your wife and your relationship as a whole.
However, I’m very off put by the amount of this post that’s based on you talking about liking sex, prioritizing sex, about how you wouldn’t have married her if you knew she couldn’t “keep up”…Sorry to say this OP but- This whole post is screaming “IM A SEX ADDICT!”. I think you honestly should think about seeking some therapy on your own behalf in regards to your connection with sex personally.
I agree sexual chemistry and connection is important within a relationship but it should not be what makes or breaks it. In certain cases you’re completely sexually incompatible but that doesn’t seem like your case. It just seems like you’re rather addicted to sex while your wife is going through a depressive episode, leading her to feel insecure or doubt herself within your relationship.
You not physically cumming is definitely causing her to feel a certain way, and sure to you this is your preferred way to enjoy sex but to her it doesn’t feel right…She feels like she isn’t doing enough, like you want more, or like something or someone else could please you better. This problem comes down to communication. You both have different perspectives on sex, and what makes sex pleasurable to you. So you both need to discuss these in immense detail and depth in order to find middle grounds and truly understand and appreciate one another’s perspectives/preferences.