ETA: Tried to remove “where there is a material difference” from the title, but couldn’t. I realized while writing this that the height difference probably wasn’t the issue. I (23F) recently started dating someone (25M) and had an interesting encounter – I’ll try not to make this too long. I definitely feel like I’m more experienced when it comes to sex, even though I don’t have a lot of experience. Last night, things got a little heated with my bf and me for the first time, and things were going great at first. He was up-front about the fact that he didn’t have much sexual experience, which is fine with me – everyone has their first time, or even the first time in a while, and sometimes Helps someone figure out what they like. It was more fun (he said he didn’t have much experience, so I don’t know what that really means). I think this is also where the problem came in, though. Once we tried to have sex, it… didn’t work. My first thought was that it might have been our height difference (I’m 5’3″, he’s probably about a foot taller than me), but I’ve had sex with men of similar height before. It seemed like Like he just didn’t really know what to do. We tried missionary first and I tried directing him to aim a little further down (more towards my back instead of straight ahead), but whatever he even doing that didn’t work. i tried the top and i think it would have worked fine, however at that point he was going soft due to nerves and we eventually just went back to hugging and touching and the like We left. Overall, we both agreed it was still a positive experience – but at the end of the day we both had fun and felt better. I think he was a little embarrassed, but I assured him that his There was no reason to pass and I still enjoyed the experience. I guess I’m just looking for some advice about how we can both improve next time. I want her to understand that. How can I help with what to do without sounding condescending, and what to do? Does anyone have any suggestions on how I can help her figure out what she likes? Tia!
Advice for a couple where there is a physical difference and one is inexperienced?
2 months ago
3 Comments
Sounds like he was nervous. Is he bent or shaped a bit differently? That may have been a factor. I’d say frequency breeds familiarity and comfort. For now, just keep trying and each experience will probably be better and you will continue to learn about what each other likes and wants.
More than likely nervous. I’ve literally had this exact thing happen to me down to a T (i’m a guy). For me it was just me being nervous having sex with a new person & having a new body to get familiar with.
Suggest you treat it like a training session, no expectation to cum. Lets just try to fuck for a while and see what happens. Be aware the distraction of conversation or overthinking to change positions will cause. Most men to go soft. Im very experienced, but when trying a new or unfamiliar position it can cause me to go soft. 5 min of kissing and fondling and Im back.